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                          November 29, 2001

                           NOTE FROM ERIC:

             As if America hasn't suffered enough, the
             Blockbuster Entertainment Awards, planned
              for this April, have been cancelled due
                to "the uncertainty of the times".


                The Top 9 Results of Cancelling the
                  Blockbuster Entertainment Awards


 9. Diminished belief in the book of Revelations as signs of the
    Apocalypse continue to disappear.

 8. Jerry O'Connell has to find something else to host or remain
    unemployed for another year.

 7. Previous Blockbuster Awards ceremonies will be available for
    rent for those feeling nostalgic.

 6. UPN devastated by the loss of a potential 3 share.

 5. All would-be participants go back to loitering in front of
    liquor stores.

 4. Outraged fans in the millions will boycott Blockbuster until
    they agree to put the show back on. Yeah, right!

 3. Now, get free award and microwavable popcorn with the
    purchase of two overnight rentals.

 2. Actors actually relieved, not having to deal with the hassle
    of having their award back to Blockbuster by noon on the 6th
    day after the show.


               and the Number 1 Result of Cancelling
               the Blockbuster Entertainment Awards...


 1. Terrorists around the world rejoice, dance and shout: "They
    cancelled it! We won! We finally won!"



              [   Copyright 2001 by Chris White   ]
              [          www.topfive.com          ]


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Selected from 39 submissions from 9 contributors.
Today's Top 5 List authors are:
------------------------------------------------------------------
Michael Cunningham, Woodridge, IL      -- 1, 4, 6
Craig D. Barker, Livonia, MI           -- 2
Clifton J. Gray, Tucson, AZ            -- 2
Michael Sheinbaum, King of Prussia, PA -- 3, 9
Douglas Jones, Santa Cruz, CA          -- 5, 7
Eric M. Wakeford, Niagara Falls, ON    -- 8
Eric F. Lipton, Chicago, IL            -- Script Doctor

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[      Copyright 2001 by Chris White   All rights reserved.      ]
[           Do not forward, publish, broadcast, or use           ]
[          in any manner without crediting "TopFive.com"         ]
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