================================================================== TOPFIVE.COM'S LITTLE FIVERS -- MOVIES Some assembly required. ================================================================== December 5, 2003 NOTE FROM KRISTIAN: Hollywood has several new takes on the Christmas film this year. So do we... (Today's list includes submissions from our readers.) The Top 9 Modern Christmas Movies 9. Pamela Anderson's Magical Ornaments 8. Christmas in Paris (Hilton) 7. Al Sharpton's Dreaming of a Non-White Christmas 6. It Would Be a Wonderful Life If Jimmy Stewart Had Never Made That Damn Movie 5. Toymaster & Elf Commander: The North Side of the World 4. The 12 Gays of Christmas 3. Yes, Virginia, There Is a Spiritual Holiday Behind This Ridiculously Over-Commercialized Excuse for a Debt-Laden Shopping Spree 2. The Day the Earth Stood Still 2: Waiting in Line at Wal-Mart and the Number 1 Modern Christmas Movie... 1. The Miracle on 34th St. II: Defendant Claus Gets Electroshock [ Copyright 2003 by Chris White ] [ www.topfive.com ] ================================================================== BIG HITS Seasons Greetings! Editor Kris here. I just wanted to stick my big ol' opinion right in to tell everyone to go see Elf instead of Cat in the Hat. A Christmas movie should be fun, sweet and wonderful, not manic, psychedelic and crass. Something you laugh out loud at while sitting next to your kids, not cringe while plugging your ears. Elf is the former, Cat is the latter, trust me. (And if you wanna see some really crass adult humor, go see Bad Santa!) Just my opinion. Now, where's my double-nog eggnog? ==================================================================
================================================================== Selected from 108 submissions from 31 contributors. Today's Top 5 List authors are: ------------------------------------------------------------------ Brandon Hunt, Braintree, MA -- 1, 8 (Ha! Ha! Ha!) Curtis Stoddard, Milwaukie, OR -- 2, 7 Jill Gallagher, Seattle, WA -- 3, 9 Gideon Griebenow, Potchefstroom, S. Africa -- 4 Larry Hollister, Concord, CA -- 5, RU list name Marcelo Rinesi, Buenos Aires, Argentina -- 6 Kristian Idol, Burbank, CA -- List Ho Ho Host ------------------------------------------------------------------ Modern Christmas Movies RUNNERS UP list -- Intolerable Yulity ------------------------------------------------------------------ Office Space 2: Rudolph the Brown-Nosing Reindeer (Brandon Hunt, Braintree, MA) Lord of the Fiiiiiiive Golden Rings (Rabbi Crut, Bowling Green, OH) Harry Potter and the Mistletoe of Hermione (Guy Payne, Leeds, Alabama) My Big Fat Nondenominational Christmas (Brandon Hunt, Braintree, MA) Home Alone 4: Saddam's Bunker (Mark Sweatt, Marietta, GA) Reservoir Elves (Mark David, Redwood City, CA) Jingle All The Way 2: The Joke's on California (Nicholas Ellinger) The Nightmare Before Christmas Eve: Mall Parking Lot (Jill Gallagher, Seattle, WA) The North American Evergreen Massacre (John English, Orem, UT) ================================================================== [ Copyright 2003 by Chris White All rights reserved. ] [ Do not forward, publish, broadcast, or use ] [ in any manner without crediting "TopFive.com" ] ==================================================================
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