Actors may be smaller than they appear.

                        September 27, 2002

                        NOTE FROM KRISTIAN:

          Last January, I became the oh-so-proud papa of
          a little red "wiener dog". And all through the 
           exhausting housetraining, all I could think was:
                "She's like a actress -- beautiful,
                     but so high-maintenance"!

      The Top 9 Differences If Movies Were Made By Dachshunds

 9. No scenes involving stairs.

 8. Even wiener dogs have enough sense not to make Pootie Tang.

 7. Widescreen format changed from 1.85:1 to 50:1

 6. Shortest guy always gets the girl.

 5. Audrey Hepburn would have a long body and a short neck.

 4. A significant increase in product placement by Hebrew

 3. The Ugly Dachshund would have been called The Stupid
    Great Dane.

 2. Crane shots replaced by cameraman standing on a folding

  and the Number 1 Difference If Movies Were Made By Dachshunds...

 1. Tom Cruise would still have to wear lifts.

              [   Copyright 2002 by Chris White   ]
              [          www.topfive.com          ]


                             BIG HITS

                     Good Owners, Great Dogs

                  Dachshund Puppies 2003 Calendar

                            Rusty Idol:

Selected from 31 submissions from 9 contributors.
Today's Top 5 List authors are:
Bruce Alter, Fairfax Station, VA -- 1, 4
Scott Witmer, Hanover, PA        -- 2, 7
Dave Ferry, Purvis, MS           -- 3
Douglas Jones, Santa Cruz, CA    -- 5
Beth Kujawski, Crown Point, IN   -- 6, 9
Rabbi Crut, Bowling Green, OH    -- 8
Kristian Idol, Burbank, CA       -- Rusty's Dad

[      Copyright 2002 by Chris White   All rights reserved.      ]
[           Do not forward, publish, broadcast, or use           ]
[          in any manner without crediting "TopFive.com"         ]

This archive is maintained by Kristian Idol at  www.13idol.com
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