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              TOPFIVE.COM'S LITTLE FIVERS  --  MOVIES
            Why, yes, we are that list on the Internet.
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                          April 16, 2004


          The Top 8 Signs You're Not Movie Star Material


 8. Instead of spending your time studying the craft of acting,
    you sit around thinking of items for Internet humor lists.

 7. You refuse to do romantic scenes with Jack Nicholson because
    of his "old man smell".

 6. They don't even let you announce the Blue Light Specials at
    work.

 5. Hair: Blonde
    Bust: 42 DD
    Name: Larry

 4. Your agent's office is above a Harley dealership, and his 
    home is inside a Ford Pinto.

 3. The last time you heard somebody yell "Cut!", you awoke to
    find half your penis missing.

 2. You plan to get to the top by sleeping with every single
    person in the credits. The closing credits.


    and the Number 1 Sign You're Not Movie Star Material...


 1. Well, they ain't exactly calling it "the Richard Solomon sex
    video", are they?



              [   Copyright 2004 by Chris White   ]
              [          www.topfive.com          ]


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Selected from 49 submissions from 14 contributors.
Today's Top 5 List authors are:
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William C. Martell, Studio City, CA -- 1, 4, 6 (Three pic deal!)
Kim Moser, New York, NY             -- 2, 3
Scott Bostick, Lake Ridge, VA       -- 4
Scott Witmer, Hanover, PA           -- 5
Brad Wilkerson, El Sobrante, CA     -- 7
Brandon Hunt, Braintree, MA         -- 8
Kristian Idol, Burbank, CA          -- Not Famous Enough

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[      Copyright 2004 by Chris White   All rights reserved.      ]
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